Alright, well we’re there in 2 Corinthians Chapter 6. And we’ve been going through a series on Sunday mornings called Peculiar People. We’ve been learning about how God desires to have a people that are holy, separated and peculiar. A peculiar treasure he calls it. And we’ve been talking about how God wants us to be different from the world. We spent a few weeks just learning about separation, and the doctrine of separation and the theology of separation. Last week we started applying it. More specifically I preached on the subject of peculiar in our clothing and how the Bible talks a lot about how God desires Christians to appear. We talked about some guidelines for your appearance and this morning I want to speak on Peculiar in our Relationships. Not only does God want us to be separate, sanctified and holy in our clothing. And we’ll look at a lot of different areas as the weeks go on.
Today we’re going to focus on this idea of relationships. And in 2 Corinthians 6 we have a verse that is often the quintessential verse when it comes to separation. But I want you to notice the context is about human relationships. 2 Corinthians 6:14 “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers.” talking about our relationships. I’m going to give you a bit of a breakdown of this passage as an introduction this morning and then we’ll get in to some specific areas in regards to a relationship. But the first thing we see in this passage is characteristics of human relationships. He’s talking about separation but then he gives the characteristics of human relationships. What it means to have a relationship with other human beings. Notice what he says there “for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?”. The word fellowship means friendly relationship or companionship.
He says look, you should not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers because you will experience fellowship with someone that is unequal to you. They are not your equal. You’re going to have a friendly relationship or companionship with that individual. Then he says, “What communion hath light with darkness?”. The word communion means the act of sharing or holding something in common. Here’s what he’s saying, when you have human relationships, those relationships will be characterized by not only fellowship(the act of a friendly relationship or companionship) but they’ll also be characterized by the act of sharing or holding something in common. What he’s teaching us is that when you develop human relationships with individuals then you should have something in common with them or be able to share something in common with them. Because of the fact that you’re going to have companionship with them. Notice what he says in verse 15 “And what concord”. That word concord means agreement between persons, groups or nation. It means concord in attitudes or feelings. He says look, in human relationships there’s going to be a concord and agreement” He says “or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel”. Part means a portion or division of a whole. It means a participation with these individuals.
Verse 16 “And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols?” Again he’s saying concord or agreement. Here’s what he’s saying, when you have human relationships, we are going to have fellowship, communion, things in common. We’re going to have concord and doesn’t the Bible say “how can 2 walk together except they be agreed?”. He says look, when you have relationships, this is the characteristics of relationships. It means you have something in agreement with the person that you are relating to or having a relationship with. You are partaking in fellowship. You are participating with them. Now in this passage, we see the characteristics for human relationships but we also see a caution for improper relationships.
Because notice what he says in verse 14 “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship” But then notice he gives us these 2 opposites. He’s saying these 2 things can’t fellowship with each other. “hath righteousness with unrighteousness?” He’s saying something that is righteous cannot be in a friendly relationship or companionship with something that is unrighteous. And he says “and what communion hath light with darkness?”. Here’s what he’s saying, light and darkness cannot have something in common. They cannot share something together. He says they are opposite of each other. Notice what he says in verse 15 “And what concord hath Christ with Belial”. Remember Belial is Satan or Beelzebub he’s called in other places in scripture and the Old testament. Here’s what he’s saying, Christ and Satan are not in concord. They are not in agreement. There is nothing that they have concurrent with each other. And he says, what part hath he that believed with an infidel. The idea is a believer with someone that is not a believer. A believer with someone who is not faithful and infidel. Someone who has faith vs. someone who does not have faith cannot participate or have part with each other.
Verse 16 “And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols?” Here’s what he’s saying, there are characteristics of relationships, fellowship, communion, concord, participation. He’s saying there’s agreement but there’s a caution because there are some things that mean you should not fellowship with each other. There are some things that do not agree with each other. There are some things that do not have things in common. I want you to understand that and I wanted to break that down because that is the context that leads us in to verse 17. We see the characteristics of human relationships and we see the caution of improper relationships. And in verse 17 we see the command for separation in our relationships. And again, verse 17 is probably the quintessential verse about separation but I want you to see that the context is in our relationships. He says that because of the fact that these things cannot agree, they don’t have things in common, they cannot participate together, they cannot have friendly relationships because in verse 17 he says “Wherefore”. The word “wherefore” means for that reason or for this reason. He says “Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you.” See the context of this verse, (And I think this verse can be used for separation in general) when he says to come out from among them and be ye separate, is in reference to human relationships. He’s talking about being able to practice separation in our human relationships.
So what I’d like to do this morning is give you 3 areas to consider in regards to being peculiar in our relationships. Now the first one is this, in the area of marriage. You should not be yoked together with unbelievers in marriage. Now the illustration he’s using when talking about being yoked together, a yoke would be a tool used to put 2 animals together to work together and labour together. That’s the illustration being used here. He says that we ought not yoke ourselves up with unbelievers but one of the specific areas I want to address this morning is in regards to marriage. You should not be unequally together with unbelievers in regards to marriage. First of all, let me just give you some advice to those of you who are not married but want to one day be married. Realize this, that God desires you to marry a believer. It is wrong for you as a Christian to marry an unbeliever. You say, I don’t know what the big deal is then just go find some believer who married an unbeliever and ask them about it. Because there’s a lot of issues in marriage with that. When it’s just you, and you’re just dating then it’s no big deal. But as soon as you start to grow up a little bit, or living for God or having children, you gotta decide how you’re going to raise your kids and where you’re going to raise your kids, these things matter. That’s why all throughout the Old Testament in the Bible and New Testament, God is often telling believers that they ought to marry believers. And look, the best thing that you can do as a believer in this room is set it in your mind that you will not marry an unbeliever. You will save yourself a lot of head ache and heart ache if you decide right now that you will only marry a believer, “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers” in marriage.
Look, is there any relationship that is more of a yoke with someone than marriage? And let me say this, if you’re not supposed to marry an unbeliever then why would you date an unbeliever? The purpose of dating is marriage. If you’re not going to marry someone who is unsaved then let me help you out. Don’t date someone who is unsaved. Don’t even start that relationship. Don’t even go down that road. Just decide that you’re only going to marry someone that is a believer. Someone that is saved. Someone that has the same belief system and faith and is on their way to heaven. I will say this, not only does the Bible teach that you should not marry an unbeliever but to take it a step further, you should not even date an unbeliever or start that romantic relationship.
And let me give you another thought. I realize that I’m a Pastor and my job is to try to help people and I deal with a lot of issues and a lot of things and I’ve seen a lot of things. Let me say this, not all Christians are created equal. And when it comes to singles, not only should you not marry an unbeliever but the Bible says “to be not unequally yoked together”, you should marry your equal. One of the biggest issues I deal with as a Pastor and one of the biggest issues that my wife deals with as a Pastor’s wife is when you have relationships where both husband and wife are saved but one wants to walk with God and serve God and the other doesn’t. One wants to go soulwinning but the other one doesn’t. One wants to tithe but the other one doesn’t. One wants to go to Sunday night church but the other one doesn’t. One wants to go to Sunday Night Church but the other one doesn’t. One wants to read 9 chapters a day but the other one doesn’t. One wants to go to an Independent Fundamental Baptist Church and the other wants to go to some liberal, rock band, casino style looking and feeling church. And they both have a testimony of salvation. But you know what, take it a step further and marry someone that’s your equal. You say, Pastor Jimenez, I’m a single and I’m a soulwinner. Then don’t marry someone who is not a soulwinner. I’m a single and I’m 3 to thrive (Sunday Morning, Sunday Night, Wednesday Night). Then don’t marry someone who is not 3 to thrive. I’m a single and I read my Bible every day, pray every day and walk with God. Then don’t marry someone who doesn’t.
You say but they’re saved. But if they’re saved and worldly then you’ll have a lot of heartaches. You’re going to have a lot of headaches. I’m just trying to help you out. If you’re wise then you’ll practice a little separation before you’re married so you don’t end up getting separated once you’re married. You’d be wise to live your life in a peculiar way so you’ll be happy. God desires for you that when husband and wife get married that you serve the Lord together. There’s a beautiful example of this in scripture. 1 Corinthians 16:19 “The churches of Asia salute you.” These are some of my favorite characters in scripture. “The churches of Asia salute you. Aquila and Priscilla” (This is husband and wife) “Aquila and Priscilla salute you much in the Lord, with the church that is in their house.” Here we have Aquila and Priscilla. And we see their names throughout the New Testament. We see it several times. And we see a husband and wife and look, they’re both on board. They’re both excited. They’re saluting the believers much in the Lord.
Look, there’s something great and something wonderful about marrying someone who is on the same page as you are. There is something awesome and something great about finding someone who is on the same track as you are. If you were both serving God already then you can both serve God together. But this idea that I’m going to go marry so and so and get her saved or get him saved and disciple them and get them to grow. No you’re not. You’re not likely to. And let me let you in on a little secret. I’m not trying to hurt your feelings but once you’re dating someone, you can’t trust anything they say or do. You will not know that individual. Look, if you don’t know that individual’s character before you started dating then you won’t know after. Once you start dating, they’re going to tell you “Once I get married I’m going to lose weight. Once I get married I’m going to get a job. I know I’m a loser right now. I know I can’t get up before 11:00 am now. I know I’ve been unemployed for 3.5 years now. But baby, once I get married, then I’m going to lose weight. Then I’m going to get a job.”. No they’re not. If they were lazy before, once they get married, once the “I Dos” are said, then they’ll be lazy.
I’m trying to help you out. If they were bad with finances before you are married then they will be bad with finances after you’re married. Just understand that. If they had a character issue before you got married then they’ll have a character issue after you got married. Salvation doesn’t change your character. It changes your destination. But the Word of God can change who you are. If they had a character issue, if they had a drug problem, if they had a drinking problem, if they had an employment problem, if they had a fornication problem, look, if they had that before then they’ll have that still. And look, go down that road if you want to but don’t say that Pastor didn’t warn you. How about your kids? Make sure they don’t date someone who is not a soulwinner. If my kids are a soulwinner then they better date someone who is a soulwinner. If my kids read the Bible every day then they better marry someone who reads the Bible every day. Not only should you not marry an unbeliever but you should marry someone who is your spiritual equal.
Aquila and Priscilla got to serve God together. Romans 16:13 “Greet Aquilla and Priscilla, my helpers in Christ Jesus.” Both of these individuals are sold out. Both of them were excited about serving God. This is the most frustrating part about this and this ministry. What I’ve noticed is that when couples get together, if they’re not on the same page then they will be on the same page the rest of their lives. Whatever that page is. If they get backslidden then they’ll both get backslidden. When they get right with God, they’ll both get right with God. I can’t prove this from scripture. This is totally anecdotal but this is what I’ve learned in the past 8+ years of ministry. Whatever page couples get on, that’s the page they will stay on. What’s interesting is that I’ve literally seen this multiple times. My wife has seen this multiple times. You’ve got a man who wants to do right or live right and they get married on the opposite page. The man gets backslidden and the woman decides to start living for God and now they fight because they want to do the opposite. I mean sometimes I’m looking at people and just thinking, “Can you 2 get on the same page?”. Before he wanted to come to church and you didn’t want to but now it’s the opposite. What’s wrong with you 2? Here’s the problem. You got together on the wrong page and you’re just going to stay on the wrong page. It’s funny because I’m wondering “Are you doing this on purpose?”. Now that my wife wants to start coming to church, you want to stop coming to church? Now that your husband got saved and baptized and is coming to church, now you want to leave church? I used to think people were messing with me but now I realized that when you get together on the wrong page, you will stay on the wrong page. Whatever page you get on, you’ll stay on that page. And they’ll flop and they’ll never be on the same page. Look, just marry someone on the same page as you are. Marry someone headed the same direction as you are. Marry someone who’s doing what you’re doing.
Acts 18:24 “And a certain Jew named Apollos, born at Alexandria, an eloquent man, and mighty in the scriptures, came to Ephesus. This man was instructed in the way of the Lord; and being fervent in the spirit, he spake and taught diligently the things of the Lord, knowing only the baptism of John. And he began to speak boldly in the synagogue: whom” Notice this “when Aquila and Priscilla had heard,” I love the fact that these 2 people in Acts, Romans, 1 Corinthians are on board, they love God, they’re serving together. “they took him unto them, and expounded unto him the way of God more perfectly.” You know I’m thankful for a wife that I can serve with side by side. But you know what, I didn’t get her to start going soulwinning. I didn’t get her to start reading the Bible. I didn’t get her to start praying.
And even today, even in our churches this wrong philosophy is taught to young men and they’re being set up for failure. Listen to me, you’re being set up for failure. When they tell you “Well in the Christian home, you’re supposed to be the leader anyway so go find some worldly girl and you’re supposed to lead her anyway so you’ll just lead her right”. No you won’t. Let me tell you something. Successful leadership has more to do with the follower than the leader. The men in this room that are leading their houses well are leading their houses well because they have a godly wife who’s submitting. And you better just figure it out. “Well I’m just going to go date some worldly girl, some unsaved girl that doesn’t care about God, who doesn’t care about the things of God but I’m supposed to be the leader and I’m just going to force her. Good luck with that. “Pastor Jimenez, you’re a great leader. Your wife just loves the Lord. She’s a soulwinner. She serves God. She loves God. She sacrifices for God. How did you do it?”. Here’s how I did it. I found a girl who was serving God before I met her. I shouldn’t say before I met her because I got her saved. But she was serving God before I dated her. She was soulwinning before I dated her. She was reading the Bible before I dated her. You understand what I’m telling you? Marry your equal. Marry a believer.
With all that said, let me give some advice to those of you who are already married. Look, everything they tell you “You marry me and I’m going to buy this house.”. No they’re not. “I’m going to cook you all these meals. I know my house is a mess right now but it won’t be once I’m married to you.”. No, it will still be a mess. Look, people will say anything. 1 Corinthians 7:12 “But to the rest speak I, not the Lord. If any man have a wife that believeth not”. Now let me just say this, the Bible teaches that you are not to divorce your wife simply because she is an unbeliever. If you marry someone who isn’t saved. You say, I made the wrong choice. Maybe you did but that’s the choice you made. You stick with it. Notice what it says, “But to the rest speak I but not the Lord, if any brother have a wife that believeth not” Notice, “And she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away”. Look, he says don’t put her away. Verse 13 “And the woman which hath a husband that believeth not and he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.”. He’s saying look, don’t just separate from someone. Look what he’s saying, if you 2 got married. Because this is what we see often, if you got married when you 2 were both unsaved, he says look it’s fine. Don’t leave them. Don’t separate from them. And if you got married when you were saved and they weren’t saved then you made that choice. Stick with it. Stay with it. God does not want you to get a divorce. So look, everything I’ve said does not apply to those of you already married. Look, you made the choice. Marriage is till death do us part. You pray for your spouse. You try to help your spouse. You say why should I not leave my unbelieving spouse? Here’s why. You are the best person to get that individual saved.
1 Corinthians 7:16 “ For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?” You don’t have to turn there but in 1 Peter 3:1 “Likewise ye wives be in subjection to your own husbands that if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation” That’s a lifestyle of the wives. The Bible does not teach that you are to separate because you married an unbeliever. You stick with it. You say why? Because marriage is for life. 1 Corinthians 7:39 “The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth. But if he be dead she as at liberty to be married to whom she will.”. Notice this last phrase, “only in the Lord”. Here’s what he’s saying. The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth. As long as your spouse is alive, you’re married. Marriage is till death do us part. We’re not Mormons, ok. You’re not going to be married in heaven but while you’re alive you’re both married. But if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will. If her husband dies or the wife dies, then they’re free to get married. But notice the caveat, only in the Lord. It’s still the idea, don’t marry an unbeliever. God says you can marry whomever you want as long as they’re saved. As long as they’re in the Lord.
Romans 7:2 “For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband.”. The Bible teaches clearly that marriage is until death do us part. That’s why in those traditional vows you say “Till death do us part”. Why? Because it is a lifetime commitment. Because it is a lifetime commitment, you may want to be wise about who you marry. So we’re learning about not being unequally yoked and the first one in relationships is with marriage. If you’re a single in this room then just decide that I will not marry and I will not even date an unbeliever. And if you do marry a believer then make sure they are your spiritual equal. Make sure you are on the same page. Make sure you’re doing the same things.
Not only should you not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers in marriage but you should not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers in your extended family. Now this is where I’m going to step on some toes. For some reason people don’t care if I preach against their spouse but they care if I preach against their mom or grand mom or aunt whoever or cousin so and so. But did you know that Jesus taught that your faith might put you at odds with your family. Some of you are already scared. Some of you are living this. Matthew 10:34 “34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.” And this is the example he gives. “For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.”. Notice verse 36 “And a man’s foes shall be they of his own household.”.
Jesus taught that when your faith, when you got saved and began to walk with God and serve the Lord that your faith may put you at odds with your family. In fact, your foes may be those of your own household. And you may have family that you do not see eye to eye on because of spiritual things. And you say, well what are we supposed to do about that? Because not only did he teach that your faith may put you at odds with your family but Jesus taught that you’re going to have to choose and you may have to make a decision between God and your family. And we’re not talking about your spouse. Again, we just learned that you’re not supposed to divorce your spouse for any reason ever, period, till death do us part. We’re talking about extended family here. Family you’re not married to. Let me help some of you out. Look, you’re not married to your mom. You’re not married to your grandma. In fact, the Bible says that when you get married you are to leave father & mother and cleave unto your spouse. That’s scriptural. Even if your mom is godly, leave father & mother. Let’s get back on the marriage subject for a second. It’s not good to have a marriage where the in-laws, where mom and dad on either side are overly involved in marriage. You leave father and mother and cleave unto your spouse. And some of you would do well not to involve your family into your marriage issues. That’s who you married, you work it out. Look, don’t try to turn your mom against your spouse or your dad against your spouse.
And look, let me give some of you some advice. Don’t get involved in marriage disputes. You know what I’ve learned as a Pastor? When people are having marriage issues, I never take a side. This is what I tell both of them. I’m for both of you. I’m against both of you. However, you want to see it. That’s where I’m at. If you want to look at it as I’m for both of you then great. If you want to look at it that I’m against both of you then that’s fine. You know why? Because you know what happens when husbands and wives make up? Guess who’s the enemy. I am. I just maintain enemy status the whole time. I’m hear to piss all of you off. I’m here to tell you what all of you are doing wrong. You shouldn’t be doing this as a husband. You shouldn’t be doing this as a wife. I don’t care if you don’t like me. I love you both, I’m telling you the truth. But look, don’t get involved in other people’s marriages. Don’t get involved in strife not belonging to you. You know who’s going to be the enemy? You mom. You dad. You brother in law or sister in law or whatever. But the Bible teaches that you may need to choose between you and your family.
Matthew 10:37 “He that loveth father or mother more than me” Notice what he says “me is not worthy of me:” This is Jesus speaking “and he that loveth son or daughter more than me” Notice what he says “is not worthy of me.”. He just said “For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man’s foes shall be they of his own household. He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me.”. Now hopefully you can get your family saved. And hopefully your family is saved. And hopefully you can all serve God together. And I thank the Lord that for my family, I grew up in a Christian home and my whole family and parents and siblings attend this church and serve God together. But honestly, that’s not the case for most people. I’m reaping the benefits of being a 2nd and even a 3rd generation Christian. On my mom’s side, my grandparents were the ones who got saved. My grandfather actually served as a Pastor for a while in Venezuela and they raised my mom as a Christian and she raised me as a Christian. My dad is a 1st generation Christian. I’m reaping the benefits of being a 2nd or 3rd generation Christian that I don’t have to have all this fighting with family members because I was blessed to be raised in a Christian home.
But you know, those of you are a 1st generation Christian…My wife is a 1st generation Christian. When I met her, she was an atheist. And she got saved, we were just friends. She started coming to church and reading her Bible and coming soulwinning. All of that while we were just friends. And we did not start dating until way after she had already been serving the Lord. And she wasn’t doing anything of that for me. And she is a 1st Generation Christian and on her side of the family, there have been some stands that we’ve had to take. There’s been some people we’ve had to cut out. And you know that comes with the territory if you are a 1st generation Christian or the first person in your family to get saved or serve the Lord. And here is what Jesus said “He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me. And he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.”. Look, you ought to fight the battles so your kids don’t have to. You ought to fight the battles so your grandkids don’t have to.
You say Pastor, I’m struggling with that. Look, I’m not minimizing that. I realize it is hard. But let me say this, you take a stand so your kids don’t have to. You fight the battle so your kids don’t have to. You say, “No, I’m not going to go to a family gathering where there is booze”. You fight the battles so your kids don’t have to. You say, well I’m a little peculiar. No, you fight that battle so your kids can grow up in an environment where they never even have to deal with it. You fight the battle of your family saying that you’re in a cult. Why? Because I don’t want to be around your pornography. I don’t want to be around your drug use. Because I don’t want to be around your drunkenness. Hey, you fight that battle so the next generation can just live in peace and prosper. You decide that you love Jesus more than anyone and anything and everything in this world. But you say, “But what about my family”. Look, the best thing is to just be tactful and friendly. Hopefully your family just understands your position and respects it. But the problem is that a lot of family members are hostile to the things of God.
Please understand this. I think you ought to be tactful when taking stands. A lot of times the problems that we have are because Christians are kind of stupid as how to deal with situations. We’ve had situations where we were invited to a wedding on my wife’s side of the family and there’s going to be alcohol or whatever. You say, “Pastor, what did you do?”. We went to the wedding. It was just at a church and normal and traditional. We gave our gift and dropped it off and said congratulations, we’re happy for you but we have to get going. God bless you. And we got in a car and left. Here’s what we didn’t do. We didn’t walk in and say “What wickedness is this?”. We didn’t write some note saying “We can’t go to your reception”. Why would you do that to unbelievers. They don’t even understand that. They don’t get that. With unbelievers, all you need to do is talk about salvation, period. All of your stands, they don’t even know all that. Sometimes people think “My family hates me for my stand for Christ.”. No sometimes they hate you because you’re an idiot.
And by the way, sometimes other Christians hate you because you’re an idiot. You know, in our home we take a stand against Disney and we don’t watch Disney. We’ve lived in California and never gone to Disneyland. But you know when someone gives our kids something with Disney on it, we just say thank you. You don’t need to tell everyone about your position. If someone gives me a card with a NIV verse, I don’t rip it up and say “This is wicked. Find me a King James one.”. You say Pastor, do you read the NIV? No I don’t. Do you give out cards with NIV verses? No I don’t. Do you throw away people’s gifts that they give you with a NIV verse? No I don’t. Some people are growing, they don’t know. They’ve never heard that. They’ve never talked about it. You don’t have to be a jerk about your stands. This is why the Bible says Grow in Grace and in the Knowledge of our Lord and Savior. See the problem is a lot of people grow in knowledge and they know everything about everybody but they never grow in grace. They haven’t learned to be graceful. You know what the Bible says about us is to do justly. The Bible says that God requires of us to do justly meaning to do right. But then he says this, to love Mercy. We ought to be graceful with people. We ought to be merciful with people. We ought to be patient. We ought to understand that not everybody’s on the same page as we are. Not everybody knows what we know. Not everybody even believes what we do. Maybe they know but don’t believe all the same things. Look, it’s fine. And you don’t have to be a jerk. And honestly, it’s pride. It’s pride that makes us say “I gotta tell everybody on all of the things they’re wrong about”. Who made you the spiritual police? Where you gotta correct everyone and tell everybody why they’re wrong. Why does it matter? It matters because of your pride.
Matthew 12:46-50
“While he yet talked to the people, behold, his mother and his brethren”. I don’t have time to develop this but the brothers of Jesus weren’t even saved. At this point they’re not even saved. They weren’t believers. “his mother and his brethren stood without, desiring to speak with him.
Then one said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee. But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren? And he stretched forth his hand” Because look, he’s having church. His mom and his brethren stood without. They won’t even come in the building but they’re interrupting the service. They desire to speak with him. “And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren! For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother.” Do you know what Jesus is saying? Jesus is saying that sometimes you might have to replace your physical family with your spiritual family. Sometimes you might just have to tell your family….I’m talking about people that are hostile to you. Again about the gifts, if people are just trying to be nice to them then you don’t have to throw it in their face. But ya if they’re trying to influence your kids in the wrong way then defend your kids. Sometimes they’re just being nice and they don’t know about what you believe. Praise the Lord that someone loves you enough to give you a gift. Praise the Lord that someone loves you enough to think about you. But you may have to replace your physical family with a spiritual family.
Proverbs 18:24
“A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother”. Sometimes those spiritual friends will stick closer than your physical family. So we’re talking about not being unequally yoked together with unbelievers and one area is with marriage. Another area is with your extended family. Let me give you the 3rd area and we’ll be done. Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelieving friends. Be not unequally yoked with unbelieving friends. Now please understand, you should not develop friendships and deep relationships with unbelieving friends. I’m not saying you should not be friendly. You ought to be friendly with your neighbors. You ought to be friendly with your coworkers. You ought to be friendly with unsaved people in your life. But your deep friendships and relationships ought not be with unbelievers. You say why is that? Because you will be like your friends. You will be like your friends.
Proverbs 13:20
“He that walketh with wise men shall be wise”. “He that walketh with wise men shall be wise but a companion of fools shall be destroyed”. I like the quote that’s in the bulletin “Be around the people that you want to be like because you will be like the people you’re around”. That’s a scriptural principle. He that walketh with wise men shall be wise. You want to be wise? Walk with wise men. You want to be a fool? Walk with fools. That’s what the Bible’s teaching here. Proverbs 22:24 “Make no friendship with an angry man”. “Make no friendship with an angry man and with a furious man thou shalt not go”. Why does God not want you to make friendships with angry people. Verse 25 “Lest thou learn his ways and get a snare to thyself”. See, when you are friends with bitter people, do you know what you become? Bitter. When you’re friends with angry people, do you know what you’ll become? Angry. When you’re friends with liars, do you know what you’ll become? Liars. When you’re friends with crooks, do you know what you’ll become? Crooks. When you’re friends with wise people, do you know what you’ll become? Wise. When you’re friends with soul-winners, do you know what you’ll become? Soul-Winners. I travel around the country and people ask me how we have 80 to 90 soulwinners each week since the average Old IFB has like 10 soulwinners weekly. And honestly, one reason why that is because when you start hanging around soulwinners, you’ll want to go soul-winning. You say Pastor, why do you do this 9 chapters in the month of January challenge every year? Because what I’ve realized is that if we can get you reading 9 chapters a day and you’re hanging out with people doing it then you’ll want to read the Bible. You’ll start becoming like your friends.
I remember I was reading in a book one time that they did a study that if you take your 3 closest friends annual income and add it up and divide by 3 then that will equal your income. Isn’t that interesting. Do you know why? Because birds of a feather flock together. Because you will be like your friends. Because you will be like the people you hang out with. Some of you are broke because you’re hanging out with a bunch of broke people. You’re in debt because all of your friends are in debt. You’re having marriage problems because all of your friends are having marriage problems. Proverbs 27:17 “Iron sharpeneth iron so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friends”. When you are choosing friends, choose a friend that makes you better. Here’s all I’m telling you. If you want to have a marriage that is strong and successful then I’d hang out with people that have strong and successful marriages. You want to raise kids that are godly and love the Lord? I’d start hanging out with people who raise godly kids. If you want to have your finances in order, I’d start hanging out with people that have their finances in order. If you want to be thin, start hanging out with people. I’m just telling you that you will be like the people you hang around with. If you want to be spiritual, hang out with people who are spiritual. If you want to be sober, hang out with sober people. Because you will be like your friends. You want to see what you’re going to end up like? Look at your friends. Iron sharpeneth iron, so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend. You will be like your friends. Listen, you will be like your friends so be around the people you want to be like. You will be like your friends so make good friends. You will be like your friends so make sure you have friends that are encouraging you, helping you, motivating you. Not making you worse but making you better. Because you will be like your friends.
Acts 2:41 “Then they that gladly received his word were baptized and the same day were added unto them about 3000 souls and they continued stedfastly” (It’s talking about church life) “in the apostle’s doctrine and fellowship and in breaking of bread and in prayers”. Hebrews 10:25 “Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together as the manner of some is but exhorting one another and so much the more as ye see the day approaching”. The Bible says don’t forsaking the assembling of ourselves together. You say, why? So you get good Bible preaching? Well that’s a good reason. But he also says this, exhorting one another. Look, let me explain to you. Because people tell me and other churches like ours, “Well I can get the same Bible preaching. I’ll just watch it online”. That’s true. But you know what you can’t get on the facebook livestream? You know what you can’t get on the Youtube livestream? It’s developing friendships. You say, “Well I got 7942 friends on facebook”. Ok. Whatever. Whatever that means. Your friends on Facebook you’ve never met? You’re not even sure if that’s really their picture. Are they going to pray for you when your kids are in the hospital? Are they going to visit you when you’re having health problems? Are they going to pray for you when you’re having marriage struggles? Look, we were made for community. We were made for relationships.
God did not institute. God did not institute Facebook groups. He instituted local New Testament Churches, where people physically go and gather. And yes we listen to preaching but that’s only a small aspect of what we do here. You know what else they do? They show up to the Married Couples Sweetheart Banquet. You know what else they do? They show up to the Men’s Preaching and Pizza night. You know what else they do? They show up to the Homeschool Activities, and the Homeschool Field Trips and the Baby Showers, and they show up to the Ladies Tea, and they show up to the Ladies Christmas Party. I’m just telling you that Fellowship is a big part of your spiritual growth. And you would do well to arrange your social life, not around Little League, not around Bowling Leagues, not around social media. You would do well to surround your social life around God’s people and God’s Word in the house of God. Because you will be like the people you surround yourself with. And some of you are living your lives in a way that’s very destructive because you’re around people that are very destructive. They’re not bad people. They’re just not godly. They’re not bad people. They’re just not spiritual. They’re not godly. Look, iron sharpeneth iron.
So when we talk about separation, peculiar in our relationships. What are we talking about? Be not ye unequally yoked together with unbelievers in marriage. Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers in your extended family. And I’m not saying you have to cut out your extended family. If they’re reprobates. If they’re haters of God. If they’re hostile toward you or hurting your family spiritually. Then ya you need to cut them out. If they’re neutral or worldly then love them. Pray for them. Be as involved as possible where you can be. Take strong stands but do it tactfully and kindly. Take strong stands but do it gracefully. But don’t try to burn the relationship with your family. You’re their best hope for salvation. And when it comes to friends, develop friendships with spiritual people who love God’s Word. Who love God and the word of God because you will be like the people you surround yourself with.
Let’s pray.